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You don’t have to be ‘alpha’

October 21, 2011

You don’t have to be perceived as “the man.”

You don’t have to force-sit with your legs apart, or take up space.

You don’t have to be loud and boisterous compared to everyone else.

You don’t have to size up your “competition” every time you go out, wondering who could be more ‘alpha’ than you.

You don’t have to think of the most ‘alpha’ response to a text in order to avoid looking weak.


In short: you don’t have to focus on being alpha. What matters is being comfortable in yourself.


You’ll notice that the most confident men are those who are comfortable in their skin, despite knowing just how nerdy/quirky they are. You can be at your own pace and your own preferred level of energy.

So if you feel like crossing your legs, then do so. If you don’t feel like flirting with the cute girl next to you, then you don’t have to. And for your own sake, learn how to make decisions and respond without allowing others to be your judge of character.


Do what you feel comfortable doing, not what someone says you should do. This goes both ways. MSM doesn’t have it right, and neither should the PUA’s tell you how to act either. Only you know where you should be. You can find those answers from within.



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  1. You don’t have to try to be alpha | Koanic Soul

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