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Surprising…Not Really

September 8, 2011

A recent look at Single City guy’s blog provided an interesting question with even more revealing answers. Readers were asked what they wished to improve in their dating life. There were sufficient options to choose from, yet I found the top three (namely the first one) to be a bit of a surprise:


1. Be better at approaching people 38.1%

2. Be better at having sex 15.87%

3. Being better to pick out “the one”! 11.11%


Ok so I’m not all that surprised. Afterall, people seem to think they cannot approach a person of the opposite sex unless they have something clever or interesting to say. Even further, we’ve bought in to this false notion that some people are just “out of our league” and simply untouchable. We should avoid this idea at all costs.

Then again, “being better at approaching people” could mean anything. One could fear the idea of talking to strangers. Or perhaps they just come off too weird and throw the other individual off. Whatever the case may be, our species is in bad shape if we cannot even engage in the initial process of forming bonds with each other.

If you’re scared, just realize it’s not that big of a deal. In fact, It’s normal to fear talking to strangers. Yet, like most fears, you can turn it into an exciting prospect. Maybe you’re worried about the outcome. Seb Callow at the Authentic Man Within has written an excellent post that covers the bases for a successful approach.

If you think you’re awkward or creepy, visualize an approach in your mind, then ask yourself “would this make me feel uncomfortable?” Granted, the other party will likely vibe off your own comfort level, but having seen my share of pitiful approaches (coming in from behind, sticking in head too close for comfort), I feel it’s necessary to address.

Do not worry about the approach. Afterall, it only happens once.



From → Practical Steps

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