“The world takes us at our own valuation. It believes in the man who believes in himself, but it has little use for the timid man, the one who is never certain of himself, who cannot rely on his own judgment, who craves advice from others, and is afraid to go ahead on his own account.”
It blows my mind to see the number of people calling themselves “forever alone,” but in the same breath turn and ask me for dating advice. Or those who say they will “never get this position” they apply for, but do it anyway.
Perhaps it’s a defense mechanism, or a way of self-motivation, but one must wonder:
What do you really believe? Or better yet, in whom do you believe?
It should be obvious how a negative belief can sabotage your success. Trying to identify as a loser while desiring to live like a winner will give way to confusion and failure.
If you want success, then live and act like you have it. Declare it today from the inside out and don’t look back. Your identity is defined by your own valuation, not by your circumstances. “Becoming” is a fruitless process that get’s you nowhere; being, on the other hand, is your best bet for a meaningful transformation.
If you’re not reading 30 days to x, you’re missing out. Lately he’s put out a series of no nonsense articles that go less to theory and more to action. Here’s a blip from his latest post, three activities to avoid:
3. Associating with negative people
A long time ago I used to pal around with this guy who was a total deadbeat.
If you went out to eat he wouldn’t pitch in a single dime.
The dude wanted something from everyone but wasn’t willing to give back.
For a long time this made me mad.
One day I realized that there was a simple solution. I quit hanging out with him.
It’s one thing to complain about the negativity you’re experiencing; it’s another to take concrete steps towards eliminating it. Most of the time, it involves removing someone from your everyday interactions, or removing yourself from bad company. Nonetheless, the vigilance in monitoring the company you keep lies squarely in your court.
Disclosure: this is not an ad. I don’t know him; he don’t know me.
In light of the new SheTaxi service, a cab service that serves only female passengers, males, especially cab drivers, need a clear wake up call. According to the founder, the service was created with concerns of male cabbie harassment.
With that said, let’s go over 3 rules that will help male cab drivers navigate the murky waters of everyday city transportation:
1) Stop denying you’re a predator. Cab harassment is a real thing. Keep your hands to yourself and your eyes on the road.
What’s that? Never in your 18 years of driving have you even conceived of such a thought? You’re missing the point. This isn’t about bad apples or crappy individuals; this is a gender issue. Men lie, cheat, steal, and guess what? Men harass. Please, no more excuses.
2) See a woman? Keep it moving. The only surefire way to protect your over-the-top masculine desires from erupting is to stop picking up women completely. Disregard your notions of chivalry and business and cater to only male customers. Afterall, we’ve witnessed what all you men are capable of for the average women just trying to head to work in the morning:
3) Quit Your Job. Apparently your profession is full of predators, as the multitude of incidents listed in the article suggests.
You’re very welcome.
From Reader Mikeemisme, Kindly requested before my hiatus:
Most people don’t succeed because they don’t even try. Now there’s something to be said about refining yourself, but after a certain point you just need to *do*
Imagine the young aspiring athlete who spends hours reading about workouts and proper free-throw shooting technique, but never steps into the gym. Or the man who wants to start his business, but never moves past multiple readings of how to start a business. Or, worse yet, the man that studies the act of approaching people in public, but (you guessed it) never approaches anyone in public.
To all these, I ask: what are these people waiting for?
To you, I ask: what are YOU waiting for?
I can just hear the excuses now:
I’m just not ready yet: Truth is, you will never be 100% ready. But I’ll tell you what: making a move when you’re 10% ready beats the daylights out of never starting. If you never start, consider yourself a Zero Percenter.
I’m waiting for the right time: All things considered, there is no right time. So why not wait after making a move? Instead of waiting to start your business, start your business and wait. Instead of looking for that perfect window to speak to someone, just speak to them and see where things go.
If you’re dealing with a time-sensitive discipline, such as investing, then there may be a favorable time after all. But in the meantime, ask yourself what practical steps you can take right now. The answer might just surprise you.
I have no idea what I’m doing: That’s good, because doing is practice. When you figure out where you went wrong, you can go back to the drawing board, in the aim to adjust later. This is a successful method of mixing in theory & practice.
I’m just lazy: Make a to-do list. Keep it short, 3 to 5 items. Do them, check off, repeat. This will form a habit and push you into unthinking, machine-like productivity.
Is there an excuse I missed? Post it below. To the rest of you: go forth and do good.